To Have Loved Him
by 12stoneswithin
Summary: Kagome has lost her memory and is soon to become Inuyasha's second mate. To avoid this she will go on an adventure that leads her to find the truth and love. SessKag, TogaKag, InuKik, and InuKag pairings
1. Why Can't I Remember?

To Have Loved Him

By: Saya Soharu

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

Dear Diary,

The years since Naraku's defeat and the closing of the well have been a blur. I hardly remember what my family looks like or why Sango and I rarely talk, but most of all I can't remember agreeing to being his second mate. Although, I love him and have always wanted to be his I can still remember the day he announced to the group that he would be mated to Kikyo. Hearing him say such a thing with confidence and pride had killed me on the inside. For weeks he ordered everyone around making sure everything would be perfect for when she came back to Edo. Even then I still held onto the hope that he would back out at some point.

Somewhere in my subconscious I knew he wouldn't but being stubborn I refused to let my hope die, I refused to believe he loved her more. Then came the day of their mating. She looked radiant and the usual distance in her eyes was replaced with a sparkle of joy as she stared down the flower filled aisle only to meet his equally joyous eyes. Seeing the look they had shared made me envious and bitter. He had never looked at me the way he looked at her that day. Even now on the eve of our mating when he looks at me his eyes fail to hold such joy.

Nevertheless he still tries his best to treat me as he does her with love and kindness. He's even gone so far as to make time for him and I away from everyone but somehow even now I still feel uneasy about all of this. I still feel the doubt gnawing at me constantly but the strangest part about all of this is the recurring dreams that feel as though they might be memories.

I feel as though these dreams make me doubt him more and more but I can't brake it off until I can remember something past their mating. I can only hope that my memories return soon so that I might not be so confused or scared. So that I might be able to find myself again.

Your's Truly,

Kagome Higurashi


	2. The Beginning of Finding Myself

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 2

The Beginning of Finding Myself

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

 _Dear Kags._

 _I miss you greatly and I'm sorry that I can't be there with you right now but I promise I'll do my best to be there for your mating. I hope to hear from you soon._

 _Love,_

 _Sango_

"Kagome, it's just a letter stop fussing over it!"

"You don't understand!" my headache is starting to turn into a migraine from all the yelling I've done today. " It's so unlike her maybe I should go visit or she could come here?"

"Feh, just leave it alone she's fine she can take care of herself." as Inuyasha walks away I can't help but feel ignored and annoyed by him and his lack of worry over our friends. It's been months since either of us have received anything from Sango or Miroku and now this note appears. It all feels just too odd and coincidental that it would show up now.

Perhaps he is right though maybe I am overreacting from the stress of planning my mating and making something out of nothing. My head pounding like a jackhammer and wondering about the village isn't helping much either. As I come upon Keade I can't help but feel a small relief.

"Keade, I think I might skip training today I'm not feeling so well." as she looks at me I feel like a young child about to be scolded.

"Ye must be ill to miss a training session." as she stand and hands me the basket of herbs I can't help but except my fate and begin walking toward the practice field. "Although, ye are not truly ill I will give you a break from practice today, however; ye must take those herbs to my hut and rest there so ye might recover from what ails ye." I can feel the surprise plain as day on my face but nonetheless I can't help myself from running to hug her,

" Thank you so much."

"Ye are welcome, but I would refrain from spilling those herbs or ye might have to pick more." as I jump back and begin to pick up the fall herbs I feel Kaede's hand lay on my shoulder " Child go get some rest I will keep Inuyasha and my sister from you for the day" smiling with gratitude I head off to her hut.

Kaede's hut is much smaller than Inuyasha's but it has always felt more like a home to me. Although, she has moved things around a bit I can still find where everything is with ease whereas I can't find anything at home half the time.

Looking about I can see a matt layed out off to the side practically calling my name. As I lay down sleep clams me almost instantly.

 _Through the fog I see my friends speckled throughout the demon infested ground. Sango's body lay motionless on top of those of Miroku and Kohaku while Inuyasha's body is hurtled to the ground by Naraku's tentacles. Panicking I try to run to him but I can't move I can't speak. The fog becomes denser and denser to the point it's like a concrete wall. As It begins to close in on me I feel myself hyperventilating . Soon my chest is a flame and my vision begins to fade to black but before its fully gone I see a figure cutting through the fog._

" Kagome, wake up!" I jump to attention pouring sweat and shaking violently. " Child are ye alright? You were screaming and thrashing about I thought a demon had got ye." Looking about I begin to calm down seeing Kaede sitting next to me.

"I'm fine it was just a really bad dream. It just felt too real. It felt like it had happened before." I through myself into her arms and begin to cry" Keade, they were all dead and I couldn't help them." I can feel her stiffen and then begin to run her finger through my hair.

" Sadly ye are not wrong in feeling that this was a real event. Child ye friends all died in the final battle against Naraku. The only ones who survived were ye and Sesshomaru it was out of respect for ye that he granted you the gift of bringing them back."


	3. The Value of Respect

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 3

The Value of Respect

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

" Why would he do that for me ?"

"He brought them back because ye earned his respect and in demon society that means a great deal." looking at me she begins to make tea. " During the battle ye showed him that ye were worthy of his respect. Ye stood proud and strong in the face of adversity. Ye fought with all ye had and ultimately proved to him that ye were his equal. It is because of ye that your friends and soon to be mate are among the living." Keade had no reason to lie but even so what could I have done that would impress him so much?

" Keade I don't remember the battle in it of itself all I can remember is almost suffocating in a cloud of miasma and being saved by someone." putting my head in my hands and leaning forward I can feel my headache returning."I don't even know who saved me." Tapping me on the shoulder she waits patiently for me to look up and kindly hands me a tea cup.

"Ye should speak with him and ask him what happened. For only he will have the answers ye seek. However, I would do so without telling your future mate he might not be too fond of the idea." even in her old age she can still manage to know exactly what I need even when I myself haven't a clue what to do.

" I don't know when I would have the time. I still have a lot of finishing touches I have to take care of before the mating. On top of that Inuyasha most likely won't let me out of his sight until we've mated because he says it leaves me open to other males."

"Child, if ye wish to speak with Sesshomaru I will help ye all ye have to do is ask." looking into her old wise eyes I feel a sense of relief almost as if a burden has been lifted from my shoulders.

" I want to speak with him so that I might be able to find myself again." hugging her is the only thing keeping me grounded from my other worldly excitement.

" Then ye will speak with him. Let me take care of everything and ye relax until I signal ye that it is time." pushing me an arms length away she looks into my face as only a mother would. " The signal will be me telling you that _there will be no training today_ do you think you can remember that ? "

"I can remember that no problem."

"Now go before Inuyasha comes looking for you" As I leave her home I can't help but look forward to my meeting with Sesshomaru.


	4. Questions Left Unanswered

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 4

The Value of Respect

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

What Happened Last Time-

" I want to speak with him so that I might be able to find myself again." hugging her is the only thing keeping me grounded from my other worldly excitement.

" Then ye will speak with him. Let me take care of everything and ye relax until I signal ye that it is time." pushing me an arms length away she looks into my face as only a mother would. " The signal will be me telling you that _there will be no training today_ do you think you can remember that ? "

"I can remember that no problem."

 **4 Days Later**

" Kagome, _there will be no training today_ ye will be heading west to a neighboring village." Keade's words made my heart quicken with anticipation. " They sent for our aid many weeks ago but I cannot leave the village unattended. I have sent a letter ahead of ye to inform them of the change in plans. Kagome, remember to keep and open mind and an open heart upon arrival. Ye may not like all ye learn but trust in oneself is necessary for a Miko." Keade leaned forward giving me a kind motherly hug, " Now ye must be ready to leave within the hour. They expect ye to be there within the day and to stay for up to two weeks." As I got up to leave my heart was practically doing backflips in excitement. " Oh and Kagome I have already spoke with your Intended. He is fully aware of the postponement of the mating and although he is angry he understands why ye must leave." glancing at my mother figure I couldn't help but feel gratitude swell within me for having her here.

"Thank you so much for everything and I promise when I come back I will know who I am and I will know what to do" having seen her understanding smile I turned and ran to Inuyasha's hut and packed what I could for my travels.

 **Later That Evening**

Now where could he possibly be I've been sitting here for hours waiting for him to appear so that I can have my answers. It feels like no matter which brother I try to speak with neither has any grasp on time. Sighing in frustration I lay down on the grass staring at the clouds as they danced across the sky. As I watched them dance I couldn't help but feel the need to document my feelings once again.

Dear Diary,

As I lay watching the clouds dance across the sky I can't help but feel a small tingle of jealousy. Sometimes I envy their dance for they always seem to intertwine in the most beautiful ways. Slipping and sliding along each other seamlessly like Yin and Yang. Forever equal in a way I can never hope to be as Inuyasha's second mate. For no matter how hard i may try he will never be mine alone. He will always have someone else to run to when I anger him or he deems me unsatisfactory in anyway. Not to mention I will be subservient to Kikyo. It is for this reason I envy the clouds merging with the sky for they will forever only merge amongst themselves. I know I shouldn't envy them but I can't help it. To simply love and belong to another as they belong to only you is all I have ever wanted.

Perhaps it is my fate to never be loved in such away for even now with our mating but a month away he still runs from me, he still compares, but even so he still tries to love me the same way that he loves her. However, no matter how hard he tries its still evident who he loves more. Even so it is still quite possible that my fate lies with him.

I just hope that the fates are kind and generous to me.

Your's Truly,

Kagome Higurashi

Having finally finishing writing out my feelings I stretched and looked around. Being lost in thought so long I hadn't realized it had grown dark. The once milky white clouds were now a deep purple as the stars began to peak through them and the sun gave way to the moon. Strangling yet another sigh at seeing that he still wasn't here I began to set up camp for the evening. As the fire dance about the wood I lay down having tired from the days events and began to fall asleep to the sounds of its popping.

 **Narrator Pov**

The toad had paid dearly for delaying the old miko's message. The idiot had thought it was irrelevant since it had come from a 'human woman' and as such had simply thrown it away. Luckily, Rin had seen it and retrieved it otherwise Sesshomaru would have never known that Lady Kagome was seeking an audience with him. Nor would he be rushing to meet the young women.

 **With Sess**

I often wonder why I keep that blasted toad in my employ. To think the miko has been waiting for almost a full day due to his ignorance. If only he had simply given me the letter sooner I wouldn't be using such a great deal of youki to reach her. He of all people should know that there is unrest amongst the masses of demons who live on the border of my land. He might have killed her himself leaving her in such a vulnerable unstable environment alone. I have no other choice but to push myself to move fast and hopefully I will make it before anything happens to her.

 **AN**

I'm sorry for the delay in the posting of this chapter I ran into computer problems but they have since been resolved and I hope you all love/like this new chapter.


	5. Finding My Mate ?

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 5

Just In The Knick Of Time

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

 **What Happened Last Time-**

I often wonder why I keep that blasted toad in my employ. To think the miko has been waiting for almost a full day due to his ignorance. If only he had simply given me the letter sooner I wouldn't be using such a great deal of youki to reach her. He of all people should know that there is unrest amongst the masses of demons who live on the border of my land. He might have killed her himself leaving her in such an unstable environment alone. I have no other choice but to push myself to move fast and hopefully I will make it before anything happens to her.

 **Sess Pov**

The smell of blood wafted through the air towards me. Increasing my speed I felt a small ting of panic at the growing smell of blood, reiki, and youki dancing on my nose. How was it possible for such a small being as she to attract so much danger. It seemed every time I saw the miko she was in some sort of danger. A rather sudden blast of reiki caused me to stop abruptly just outside of the clearing. I didn't need anyone to tell me that my mask had slipped for a moment because what I saw before me was truly surprising. There she was floating in the air looking down upon several hundred mid level youki. Her eyes glanced about the mutilated pile checking for threats as her reiki whipped about her ready to strike. However, when her eyes met mine her power began to dwindle and she fell to the ground. She looked up at me with a small grin and sighed mumbling my name softly as she collapsed in a pool of her own blood. Seeing her body go limp made my body move before my mind had a chance to process what I was seeing. Lifting her up gently I became aware of several deep lacerations all over her body. My beast whimpered as I sped of in the direction of the Western Citadel but when I glanced down and saw her becoming pale and slightly blue my beast took over. I could feel the fear of my beast as we ran through the sky as quickly as we could. When we finally caught sight of the Western Citadel my beast let out a loud powerful howl alerting the healers to meet us at the gates or there would be deadly consequences. When we landed I had to pull my beast back in but even then he whimpered and lashed out at me when the healers took the miko and began to head toward the healing quarters. As the rounded the corner my beast clawed at me one last time "Save Mate" his voice rang through my head slicing me to the bone. The shock at what he said finally faded and I couldn't help but feel anxious.

 **Three Days Later**

 **Sess Beast Pov**

My mate lay unconscious for three days now her hair lay around her in black waves and her skin has returned to it original tone but she has yet to move. The healers say she will wake up soon but they wont give me an exact day or time. It is beyond annoying I just want my mate to open her beautiful eye, I want to hold my mate for the first time and tell her she is mine.

"You know that she is to be the second mate of our half brother you cannot and will not say a word to the miko." came my other halfs voice.

"I will do as I please until you can over power me or I give control back to you." he sighed becoming annoyed with me once again as he became silent. Our mates breathing began to change and i could see her eyes beginning to flutter about. I barked for a healer as i held her hand to my lips waiting for her to dull come to.


	6. Rude Awakening

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 6

A Rude Awakening

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

 **What Happened Last Time-**

My mate lay unconscious for three days now her hair lay around her in black waves and her skin has returned to it original tone but she has yet to move. The healers say she will wake up soon but they wont give me an exact day or time. It is beyond annoying I just want my mate to open her beautiful eye, I want to hold my mate for the first time and tell her she is mine.

"You know that she is to be the second mate of our half brother you cannot and will not say a word to the miko." came my other halfs voice.

"I will do as I please until you can over power me or I give control back to you." he sighed becoming annoyed with me once again as he became silent. Our mates breathing began to change and i could see her eyes beginning to flutter about. I barked for a healer as I held her hand to my lips waiting for her to come to.

 **Kag Pov**

I knew I had fainted from blood loss but I didn't realize that it was gonna hurt this much when I tried to wake up. Every inch of my body felt like it was on fire and being torn to pieces I wanted to scream but couldn't make a sound. Then I felt something soft and warm on my hand and the burning slowly went away and I was able to think straight. I felt my eyes begin to open and was met with the glowing red eyes of Sesshomaru. My blood grew hot in my veins and I couldn't help but try to say that I was okay but my voice was far to hoarse to use. Seeing that I was uncomfortable he went to let go of me and grab the water but I didn't want the pain to come back and held fast to his hand pleading with him with my eyes not to let go. He nodded slightly confused but went back to doing what he had been before. His eyes never leaving mine until the door slid open to reveal several older youki. He growled loudly and walked over to them but as soon as his hand wasn't on me I cried out in pain causing him to comeback immediately and the doctors to rush the bed. I lay panting in pain as they ran around me pushing Sesshomaru even further away. I began to panic and tried to reach for him to make the pain go away but before I could I felt a loud roaring growl as he fully shifted and curled around me. Almost instantly the pain went away and the healers all looked confused and then I saw recognition on the face of the oldest man.

" My Lord it would appear that this young lady is your mate. She cries out not because of us but because her body is trying to shift and become youki. However, without you by her side during the change she will die." at this I felt him growl and pull my body closer and nuzzle my head with his snout. "My Lord the Lady Kagome is in need of water. I'm going to grab it for her and hand it to her is that okay?" I felt him nod his head softly. In no time I had water and drank it slowly so I wouldn't choke.

"Sir, I can't be his mate I am to be the second mate of his half-brother." I said softly as Sesshomaru growled at me.

" You might have been at one point my lady but you can no longer do so. If you were to mate any other than his lordship you and he will die." his voice became sad and gruff at the last part.

" I don't think you understand my wedding isn't all that far away and I can't break a promise to my mate." I fell back to the bed as Sesshomaru shifted back,

"Do you really want to be a meger second mate for a half demon that cares not for you over being my one and only mate?" I know my face is showing my pain and shock but I can't look away as he caresses and holds my face in place. " Do you really wish to die for someone that would not die for you ?" When I look at him confused he mumbles something to himself before he looks to me with so much pain and desperation it hurts. " The day we defeated Naraku you almost died. You had harnessed every ounce of power you had and had increased everyone in a dense barrier for protection as they fought. You kept this up for days on end never wavering. However, toward the end you began to weaken but rather than letting everyone fight and die you pushed even harder causing the barrier around you to waver. Naraku saw this and went to attack you but at the same time Kikyo appeared and Inuyasha ran to protect her he got a little to far away and his barrier tried to give way but you gave up your own protection to save him. He didn't even see Naraku's tentacles circling you or hear your screams until you had already killed him from the inside out." his jaw tensed at this memory making me shiver. " To be honest Inuyasha left after you killed Naraku and wasn't scene for almost a month before he came back to the village stating that Kikyo was his mate. You had left and tried to go home only to find that you couldn't go home. At that point we all lost track of you and Inuyasha and his new mate. Kaede and I sent out several scouts but to no avail. Then one day you all came back and Inuyasha and you announced that you were to be mates as well. " at this he growled loudly. "However, the last part no longer matters you are my mate now and I won't give you up. " he nuzzled my check and kissed my hand softly before looking away and speaking softly to the doctors asking them to leave us. Once the door closed behind then I tapped his shoulder softly.

" Why did you send them away?" I hate how weak my voice sounds but I can't help it.

" They went to find answers for your amnesia as well as why you are my mate." he stated simply before laying be down and cuddling me. " Now sleep hopefully when you wake up we will have answers."


	7. My Mates?

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 7

My Mates ?

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

 **What Happened Last Time-**

" Why did you send them away?" I hate how weak my voice sounds but I can't help it.

" They went to find answers for your amnesia as well as why you are my mate." he stated simply before laying be down and cuddling me. " Now sleep hopefully when you wake up we will have answers."

 **Kag Pov**

I woke up to something soft and fluffy curled around me and couldn't help but snuggle closer only to hear a small growl beside me. Jumping up I caught sight of a very annoyed Sesshomaru and I tried to roll away only to have him pull me closer and nuzzle my neck. "Mate you know you can't leave me without pain; however, you are making it hard to remain a gentleman when you insist on teasing my person." his voice was slightly husky but it was still gentle as he whispered in my ear.

"I wasn't teasing you." I mumble into his chest.

" Were you not fondling my tail?" he chuckles softly as realization begins to dawn on me and I squeak softly in embarrassment.

" I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to tease you but we do need to talk about this whole mating thing. " pulling back and looking at his face I could tell he didn't really want to talk about it but I need this.

" What is there to talk about ? " his eyes begin to flicker between red and gold "You are mine!" his eyes are red now and I can tell he is no longer in control.

" Sessh…" I can't help but become slightly afraid at his sudden change.

"Why do you insist on arguing with me about being mine?" his voice is rough as he shakes me.

"Your hurting me Sess please stop." If I'd known this was going to make him this mad I wouldn't have said anything.

"Mate I'm sorry. I didn't mean to I just don't want you to leave." the shaking stopped and he pulled me close nuzzling my neck.

"I just wanted to understand why its happening now and how ? " I mumbled into his shoulder. "I wasn't planning on leaving." I can't help but feel weak and small in his arms as tears begin to fall and travel down my cheeks. "I'm so tired of being weak." I can feel him hold me closer and start running his hands through my hair as my tears fall upon his bare skin.

"My mate you are far from weak. You are a strong kind women capable of great things." i felt him lift my chin so that i was looking at him " We will find the answers you seek but for now rest assured that you are mine and nothing will change that."

 **Kami's Pov**

Looking down upon them smiles could be scene throughout the room but we all knew that she was not to be his mate alone. Soon she would meet her second mate and together they would all bring the world into a new era of peace and prosperity. However, as we looked upon the new couple and looked forward to the coming of the last puzzle piece we all knew they would have to defeat the new yet old evil that was brewing close to home.

 **Sess Pov**

Holding her in my arms made me feel whole like nothing bad could happen and if I was being entirely honest it made my heartache with the fear of losing her. My beast had scared her but she opened up to me she didn't lash out it made me wonder if she was really my mate but there was no denying the soul deep pull I was feeling now. Looking down on her sleeping form I couldn't help but feel peace and happiness. I could here Jaken coming but I couldn't muster the energy to wake her once more just yet. I heard a loud knock at the door followed by him squawking about a visiter but before I was able to respond my room door was thrown open to reveal my father in the flesh.

"Mate" he said as his eyes looked upon her but as our eyes met we both knew there was something terribly wrong.


	8. A Heavenly Gift ?

To Have Loved Him

Chapter 7

A Heavenly Gift ?

By: 12stoneswithin

Summary: You never quite know what life has instore for you but sometimes it's better not knowing.

 **What Happened Last Time-**

I heard a loud knock at the door followed by him squawking about a visiter but before I was able to respond my room door was thrown open to reveal my father in the flesh.

"Mate" he said as his eyes looked upon her but as our eyes met we both knew there was something terribly wrong.

 **Sess Pov**

" Father? How are you here?" I couldn't help but feel myself pull my mate closer as he eyed her.

" I know not I awoke a days trip from here this morning and once I caught the scent of my mate my beast took over and the next I knew I was knocking down your door." his eyes hadn't left her since he had come in and and it was beginning to leave a sore taste in my mouth.

" I am sorry to say but your mate isn't here father. The women before you is my mate and I ask that you leave this place if you continue to spought such nonsense." I felt the deep rumble of his growl before I actually heard it and felt his beast begin to reemerge but I couldn't leave her side until she fully changed which left me no choice but to grab her and run.

" Mine" was all I could here as I ran for our lives. He was catching up quickly and I couldn't help but wish my mate had already changed so that I could just fight him. However, since that wasn't really an option I chose to try and wake her slowly. I began calling her name and taping her lightly but as she woke up her eyes glew a soft pink.

" My lord you are mistaken in your beliefs. Lady Kagome is not just your mate, she belongs to both you and the great InuNoTashio. Together you will all usher in a era of peace and prosperity. However, to do so you will all have to accept things as they are and grow together." I couldn't help but stop dead when I heard this." Don't worry your mate will survive the change and become a beautiful and powerful demoness. She is merely acting as a vessel for a moment so that we might speak to you and your father." I could feel him standing off to the side and the retreating of his beast.

"Are you responsible for my coming back?" his voice no longer held the gutteral sound of his beast as he gained control once again.

"Yes, we are and we expect great things from the three of you." Kagome's eyes began to flash between there normal color and the glow of the kami " It appears your mate is fighting against us. Goodbye for now and remember all that has been said to you today. With that Kagome's body became limp in my arms as the glowing light faded from her. I felt the reality of the situation begin to set in as the moments dragged on. My beast whined in confusion while i looked into the peaceful face of our mate. How could we share a mate with our father ? It simply isn't done. A mate is supposed to be your equal in every regard but they are also supposed to solely belong to you and you to them. I felt the confusion slowly morphing into anger at the fact that once again my father would take something dear to me. However, when I happened to glance at his face I did not see the victory I thought would be present but a deep pain within his golden eyes as they looked upon her.

"She won't be happy when she wakes will she ?" He sounded dejected as he continued to gaze upon her.

"No she will most certainly be as she would say pissed. However, that is something we can handle at a later date right now we must get her back to the Citadel. She is currently in the process of changing and she needs her rest to make it safely." with that said I ran back not paying any mind to him running beside me.

 **Tashio Pov**

When we got to the citadel we parted ways. I couldn't seem to really process what had happened in the past hours since I awakened. The Kami gave me a second chance but I couldn't help but feel pain at knowing they didn't gift me Izayoi as well. I felt so much joy when I smelt my mate and I was hoping against all hope that she was inside that room but when I looked and saw the small women curled into my son I felt confused and pained. My beast rejoiced in finding our mate but I felt a bitter cold sweep over me. I was barely able to pull myself from the foreboding I felt long enough to hear the Kami's words. To share a mate was unheard of amongst youki. The thought of sharing my mate made my beast whimper and cry out while it gave me hope. Hope that perhaps she would reject me and the kami would grant me peace in death with my love. However, I had a sinking feeling that would not be the case as my beast clawed at its cage trying to take control back and make our mate want us.


End file.
